new poem born~~never was and never will be'~~

after watching brokeback mountain by my all-time most favourite actor,jake gyllenhaal, I feel like we should respect homosexual or bisexual, cuz I finally realized that homosexual love can be that deep and touchin' actually!!!This new poem is an homosexual-love themed poem, and to show my respect to homosexual ppl and love....I decided not to appear in the poem as third party but ' I ' ,there u go!

I wont be the one he's thinkin' at night
She is the one to be his guidin' light
I wont be the one he's gonna hold tight
She is the one to make his love shine bright

A pisces gave me all she can
But I just couldnt be her man
Hurtin' her would be a great plan
If she'd get off the dangerous van

When an argument moved along
No endurance was enough strong
Solitude night was always long
perfect fit for a heartbroken song

Although she had left him behind
She still lived on inside his mind
Love was again bein' so blind
Bacardi he was tryin' to find

The sadness had all reduced him to tear
What he said on the phone aint that clear
The loneliness had all summoned his fear
His tremblin' heart whispered in my ear

I was headin' to his place
But she was at greater pace
I was lookin' at his face
And she was in his embrace

I ended up drinkin' Bacardi alone
Got drunken till sanity was all gone
The wind was warm but I was chilled to bone
Lyin' in the street till the sun had shone

I woke up and saw madonna
She was sleepin' in the sofa
It just sounded like a drama
I knew I was in dilemma

He doesnt wanna be another 'Ennis'
Because she is Juliet and Romeo he is
And the story goes on forever like this
I never was and never will be his

away from real home for months?

Cant really believe that I have been away from my real home for nearly 3 months, there are 3 more months to go for me to go home, to my lovely paradise of delicious foods, Msia, although I am quite addicted to fast food like mcdonalds, KFC, but I still prefer to eat in msia, cuz I can have both fastfood and original oriental foods in msia, unlike england, everythin' fast food, and even the chinese restaurant also a cheater, cuz not servin' the real oriental food, but what choice do they got?Since the western ppl would never really get used to our original oriental food!They cant even eat spicy food, not all, but most of...Anyway,tell u what?Here kfc is very no-good!!Whenever whoever come to uk, never go for kfc, mcdonald is still quite okai!!

I spent my these three months working in a chinese restaurant, and I met a very good boss,they are really good!!Sometimes, I feel guilty when I do something wrong cuz they aren't the type of 'no-mercy', they said they knew I am like ' a piece of white paper, just need time to paint'....So, they very are tolerant on me, I really like my boss, but....I dont really like the colleagues here, cuz they always backbite ppl in front of boss just tryna to step u down from getting above their head, this is really an inevitable circumstance....And I learnt one lesson, whenever one steps out to society, gotta learn to protect yourself even if one doesnt wanna harm ppl, but the truth and the incident always proves that ppl need to be realistic and practical in order to survive in this no-mercy society....I dont see a reason but I really even fail to protect myself as well....I was backbit but I believe the boss is not blind although he never knows what is happening out there....

I really hope the next three months would just pass by in just a blink of an eye....And that's the time to go home to my lovely place that I used to belong.......Haha,quite silly me......

And now I've fallen into the gap between the studies in uk and in msia....I dont know which path shall I take, And I am right here on the fence, or more imaginative, lost in forest, got two paths to choose, both unseen and 'untracked' but look quite alike....Both has its own advantages, but indisputably that the disadvantages always come along with the advantages.....And you will never really know how to make a right decision....What shall I do then?Who can come help me?

This is the ever first post in my blog since I lived my life in uk alone!